One reason cancelling feels relieving is something psychologists call anticipatory stress. Long before an event actually happens, the brain starts preparing for it. You think about what to wear, what to say, how long it will take, how tired you might feel, or how the interaction could go.
Psychologist George Loewenstein, known for his research on anticipatory emotions, has shown that people often experience more stress before an event than during it. The mind keeps rehearsing and predicting, even when nothing is happening yet.
So when you cancel, you’re not just skipping the event, you’re ending hours or days of background mental tension. That’s why the relief feels immediate.